A question I’m asked frequently: Do female-led relationships work without putting the men in chastity — here’s my honest answer.
I guess the majority of people still consider chastity as an uncommon yet drastic measure. In fact, the majority of women (at least initially) tell you they would not put their partner in chastity. And I have talked to women who tried to live the FLR lifestyle without putting their husbands in chastity.
Here’s a spoiler: They all failed!
How we started our FLR
Chastity isn’t a nice-to-have — it’s an absolute must. But don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying it has to be the first step a couple has to make. Contrary, allowing the wife to put you in chastity requires enormous trust and some first experience.
In fact, from the time I started to live a female-led relationship with Max until we first dipped our feet into chastity waters, it took us almost one year. We both had the understanding to start off slowly — and to be honest, I did not want to overwhelm Max. Living an FLR requires a complete shift in beliefs. And obviously, this takes time.
You will realize when it’s time.
After several months, where I took more and more took over control of our decisions, we first started with verbal chastity.
That means I told Max he is not allowed to cum anymore — without my permission. Obviously, our sex life had already changed until we reached this point. Usually, Max was not allowed to penetrate my pussy. On the other side, he had to satisfy me orally whenever I wanted. At the same time, I reduced the times when he was allowed to cum too to a minimum.
I remember very vividly how the chastity belt came into our lives. Of course, I was the one who introduced it. We were lying in bed one evening, and he was surprised that I touched his penis and started to stroke him.
Once he was close to his orgasm, I stopped and asked him a question: “If you had the choice to cum now or to make me cum every day the next week, what would you choose?” Within a split-second, he answered, “The latter.”
That was the time he realized that his orgasms were no longer important. And with the next sentence, he said, “I think it’s time for putting me into chastity, Julia.”
Push him, but let him decide.
I believe it’s one of the secrets to turning a relationship into an FLR. You have to push him in the right direction and leave the feeling to him that he decides. Of course, it was me who was pushing him towards chastity. Every day a bit more. Not letting him cum, requesting more and more oral services, talking about it,….
A chastity belt changes everything.
Since I decided and finally locked him up, our lives have changed tremendously. I consider a chastity belt as the next level of FLR. Everything gets more spiced up. And more importantly, it unleashes the true power of FLR.
So if you ask me: No, a true FLR without chastity isn’t possible. Men will always try to escape, stroke behind your bag, get lazy, etc. It needs this instrument of power. It needs the power to be in control of his orgasms, of his penis.